I’m trying hard to not become sad about the Holidays. It’s hard to swallow having to be alone again for Thanksgiving & Christmas. Last year was really hard and I swore that this year wouldn’t be the same but here it is less than 2 weeks away from Thanksgiving & it looks like I’ll be alone again.
How do I let go of someone I love that doesn’t love me, but just uses me and I let him because I can’t let go? When will I have enough of it? It’s so miserable when reality sinks in. I try to walk away. I try to occupy my time in other ways. But it always goes right back to him and I am just frustrated and disgusted. Six years of frustration & disgust. It’s ruining me. I need it to stop. Like the saying goes, either shit, or get off the pot. For fucks sake!
Just plain & simple, I don’t vote. I am registered to vote but I haven’t voted in a while. I decided to not vote for a couple reasons. The main reason is, I hate to argue. No matter who I end up voting for, there’s always going to be someone that will want to blame me for all the trouble the U.S. is having and I take the blame for too many things that aren’t my fault as it is now. I don’t need that on my shoulders too. So there. IDGAF!
The weekend is here finally! What a hectic week. I started it off by pulling an all-nighter with the love of my life and nearly lost my job over it because I was so out of it at work on Monday. It was worth it though. Hehe! And ended it with all my work done and more. I’m hoping to see him again this weekend but this time if we pull another all nighter, I’m gonna plan it and make up for the loss of sleep as soon as possible. I am not as young as I used to be & it really messes up my concentration and thought process. Definitely not something I should be doing right now…but hell, it was so good while it was happening. I want more!
I wanna do it again…again…again…again…!