I’m trying hard to not become sad about the Holidays. It’s hard to swallow having to be alone again for Thanksgiving & Christmas. Last year was really hard and I swore that this year wouldn’t be the same but here it is less than 2 weeks away from Thanksgiving & it looks like I’ll be alone again.
How do I let go of someone I love that doesn’t love me, but just uses me and I let him because I can’t let go? When will I have enough of it? It’s so miserable when reality sinks in. I try to walk away. I try to occupy my time in other ways. But it always goes right back to him and I am just frustrated and disgusted. Six years of frustration & disgust. It’s ruining me. I need it to stop. Like the saying goes, either shit, or get off the pot. For fucks sake!