Woman vs. Women


In December I decided to take my best friend to a psychic to have our fortunes told for her birthday. She and I had wanted to do this since we were in high school. I always felt as if my husband wouldn’t allow me to do such a thing so this was one more thing…

open relationships


What exactly is an open relationship? My definition of ‘open relationship’ is there’s no commitment to any one person. So isn’t an open relationship the same thing as ‘friends with benefits’? In other words, if a person wants an open relationship he or she is a polygamist. And that word (for me) stirs all sorts…

FWB


  FWB, Fuckbuddies, casual sex – whatever you want to call it. Basically having sex with a friend or acquaintance without the woes that come from a commitment to a ‘relationship’. Am I the only person that has a hard time with this type of arrangement? Being that it’s been a little over a year…

L i f e I s C r u e l


I got married at 20. Bought my first home at 20. Had my first child at 22. Acquired my first corporation at 24. At 25 I went out dancing for the first time ever with my girl friend. I had NO IDEA what it was like out there. I never wanted to go home again!…

grrrrrrrrrrrrrrr


It frustrates me to no end when my children call while they’re with their Dad and I can hear him in the background on his phone talking with his girlfriend the way he once talked to me. It’s frustrating when I hear what he talks to them about. Why does he have to discuss our…

f o r g i v e n e s s


Today is one of those days. Those days where you just don’t care anymore. Where you just want to take one last drive alone down the Pacific Coast highway and launch yourself off a cliff at 150 mph into the end. Yeah, I’m having one of those days. I just want to listen to sad…

t r a i t s


Traits for Finding a Lifelong Mate 1. Choose someone as though you were blind. Close your eyes and see what you can FEEL; their kindness, loyalty, insight, devotion, their ability to be concerned with you, their ability to care for themselves as an independent being. 2. Choose a person who has the ability to learn,…

Noooooooo! Not VD, again?!?


    Ugh! Valentine’s Day.   Here it is again.   I will keep this as brief as I can.   This day fills me with memories of disappointment and feelings of insignificance. It just reminds me that I don’t have a man in my life that’s going to take me out for a romantic…

a l o n e


            After working on the division of our smaller assets for nearly two weeks we finally agreed on what he would take. I procrastinated for a year, dreading that list. But there it all was – listed out on my excel spreadsheet. All those memories we made together. Fifteen years….

a 5-pack of Bic lighters


    After 13 months devoted to this guy, this is what I get for a Christmas gift. This, a magazine rack and a bottle of red wine, personally signed by him! I realize we had a rough year but my fucking gawd, can a person be anymore insensitive? Only 2 weeks before he’d mentioned…

s k i n d e e p


  Everyone is initially attracted to a person by their physical appearance. That initial lure can be very strong off of appearances only. I’ve always had the theory that women that go way overboard with their make-up, hair, big fake tits, clothes and accessories are shallow and superficial. They’re usually blondes and the rest of…

The Elevator


What a day! I never did come up with those 3 words that I was struggling to find in my previous post. Which meant I really didn’t need them after all. I walked into my ex’s attorneys office strong, independent, classy, confident yet humble. The only person there was my ex. He was sitting in…

Authenticity


In my book of life… The chapter is closed. It’s a brand new day. My responsibilities to myself, to my children, to my employer are the background to my life. Taking care of me by removing the negative components that have tried to ruin me for the past thirteen months or so has been done….

20 Doors Down


Suburbia? Scraped up knees and secret rendezvous under the cover of darkness. Feeling the hard fireplace hearth as I rest my body there-puffing my cigarette, the heat radiating on my back from the flames, looking across the table into your eyes as you said those words a year ago, a feeling inside my chest like…

Christmas 2006


He & I have been having such a hard time. He’s been using what I’ve been up to as an excuse to not be with me. A few weeks before Christmas he & I decided that we would spend New Years Eve together…no matter what we ended up doing…we’d be together. I   h e l…

Epiphany!


Written 10/1/06: Hi ****, Last Friday and Saturday we talked briefly about things. I got a lot from the conversations even though they were short. You said you thought I need my space to re-prioritize my life. You also said that I have nothing to offer you anymore, that my life is a mess and…

Clouded


This e-mail was sent to him 9/28/06. Everything that has happened lately has me really wondering about your real feelings ****. I’m beginning to feel that you’re not being true to me or true to yourself about what you want. You know (maybe too well) how I feel. Aside from me not telling the truth…