In December I decided to take my best friend to a psychic to have our fortunes told for her birthday. She and I had wanted to do this since we were in high school. I always felt as if my husband wouldn’t allow me to do such a thing so this was one more thing […]
I picked up my friend at the mortuary yesterday and brought him back to my house in a neat little box. Tomorrow I have to pick up the death certificates…then begins the tedious process of cancelling/changing all his accounts. To prepare, I’ve had to sift through the mounds of papers in his house. It’s such […]
FWB, Fuckbuddies, casual sex – whatever you want to call it. Basically having sex with a friend or acquaintance without the woes that come from a commitment to a ‘relationship’. Am I the only person that has a hard time with this type of arrangement? Being that it’s been a little over a year […]
When I was a little girl I would often have thoughts of losing one or both of my parents. I don’t mean in a grocery store. Since my parents had me quite late in life it was normal for them to be planning for the day they would die. But as a little girl, maybe […]
We’re all guilty of it. But the little white lies are not what I’m writing about. They’re the big lies. Cheating. Stealing. Who you are. What you do. Your sexuality and desires. I have lied in the past about some of these things. I’m just like everyone else. I tell myself, “I can’t admit to […]
A friend of mine was recently accused of sexually harassing a female coworker. Ultimately he got fired because of it. He maintains that he’s innocent. I have no reason not to believe him. During the ‘investigation’ stage when he was suspended from work until a conclusion was made, he & I talked over the phone […]
I got married at 20. Bought my first home at 20. Had my first child at 22. Acquired my first corporation at 24. At 25 I went out dancing for the first time ever with my girl friend. I had NO IDEA what it was like out there. I never wanted to go home again! […]
It frustrates me to no end when my children call while they’re with their Dad and I can hear him in the background on his phone talking with his girlfriend the way he once talked to me. It’s frustrating when I hear what he talks to them about. Why does he have to discuss our […]
Today is one of those days. Those days where you just don’t care anymore. Where you just want to take one last drive alone down the Pacific Coast highway and launch yourself off a cliff at 150 mph into the end. Yeah, I’m having one of those days. I just want to listen to sad […]
Traits for Finding a Lifelong Mate 1. Choose someone as though you were blind. Close your eyes and see what you can FEEL; their kindness, loyalty, insight, devotion, their ability to be concerned with you, their ability to care for themselves as an independent being. 2. Choose a person who has the ability to learn, […]
After working on the division of our smaller assets for nearly two weeks we finally agreed on what he would take. I procrastinated for a year, dreading that list. But there it all was – listed out on my excel spreadsheet. All those memories we made together. Fifteen years. […]
After 13 months devoted to this guy, this is what I get for a Christmas gift. This, a magazine rack and a bottle of red wine, personally signed by him! I realize we had a rough year but my fucking gawd, can a person be anymore insensitive? Only 2 weeks before he’d mentioned […]
Everyone is initially attracted to a person by their physical appearance. That initial lure can be very strong off of appearances only. I’ve always had the theory that women that go way overboard with their make-up, hair, big fake tits, clothes and accessories are shallow and superficial. They’re usually blondes and the rest of […]
In my book of life… The chapter is closed. It’s a brand new day. My responsibilities to myself, to my children, to my employer are the background to my life. Taking care of me by removing the negative components that have tried to ruin me for the past thirteen months or so has been done. […]
Suburbia? Scraped up knees and secret rendezvous under the cover of darkness. Feeling the hard fireplace hearth as I rest my body there-puffing my cigarette, the heat radiating on my back from the flames, looking across the table into your eyes as you said those words a year ago, a feeling inside my chest like […]
He & I have been having such a hard time. He’s been using what I’ve been up to as an excuse to not be with me. A few weeks before Christmas he & I decided that we would spend New Years Eve together…no matter what we ended up doing…we’d be together. I h e l […]
This e-mail was sent to him 9/28/06. Everything that has happened lately has me really wondering about your real feelings ****. I’m beginning to feel that you’re not being true to me or true to yourself about what you want. You know (maybe too well) how I feel. Aside from me not telling the truth […]
r e l e n t l e s s